Beliefs are thoughts we accept as true. Our beliefs are stored in the area of the subconscious, and become the source of how we relate to ourselves and the outside world.

Seventy percent of our beliefs are formed by the age of six; another twenty-four percent are formed by adolescence. As a result, most of us are unaware of our beliefs and how they impact our behaviors. If we believe we are unworthy, our behaviors demonstrate unworthiness.

If you ask someone what their beliefs are, most likely they will hesitate before they respond. We all know we have beliefs, we just aren’t aware what they are and how they determine our choices and the way we relate to others.

We can learn about our beliefs by observing our current behaviors. Behaviors are one of the ways beliefs demonstrate what we believe. For example, there was a time when I was judging myself because I had experienced a series of four relationships with four different women in a row that didn’t work out. Each woman had a similar body structure. As I explored my beliefs inwardly I discovered I associated this particular body structure with having a successful relationship. It was clearly an error in approach, and a belief that was no longer working for me.

This experience lead me to explore inside of me what I really wanted in a relationship, what qualities did I have to give, and what could I do to become more nurturing and loving… all aspects I wanted to have in a relationship.

Knowing more clearly what qualities I was looking for in a relationship: my best friend, great communication and bonding on physical, emotional, mental and spiritual levels, I began to create relationships that more closely matched my intentions for a fulfilling relationship.

Another important lesson I learned from this is in order to change a belief you have to first identify it and then upgrade it into your current life. We do this through self-forgiveness, acceptance and by replacing ineffective beliefs with beliefs or experiences that are in line with our intentions.

Our beliefs shape all of our relationships: with ourselves, with God, our spouses and loved ones, our bosses and coworkers, as well as our physical, emotional, mental and spiritual health. Changing the beliefs created when we were young and updating them to more closely match our current intention for our life, gives us an experience of more closely aligning with our True Self.